urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:great_smile ... Jack 2009-07-13T19:11:24Z urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:great_smile:26449 2009-07-13T19:10:53Z 2009-07-13T19:11:24Z <a name="cutid1"></a><br /><br /><i>Gwen had said that I couldn’t leave. I wish deep down in my heart that I could have believed her. If I could have stayed, I would have. The tears in her eyes and the way that her heart was visibly breaking tugged on my heart. I am not so completely cold and heartless. Gwen always meant a lot to me. It just was very hard to look at her. She has Rhys. She doesn’t need me to be there for her.<br /><br />It’s all my fault. I have lost so many people and it’s my fault that they’re gone. I’ve brought them to the brink of danger and I’m the reason that they went over the edge. I’ve done things that nobody could ever forgive me for. I don’t blame the Doctor at all for not helping. He must have looked at our planet in shame, disgusted at what he saw. This is not the government that I signed up to help. I’ve hurt people and I didn’t even think twice about it. I’ve sacrificed people that I love and care about for the ‘greater good.’ And it didn’t phase me at all.<br /><br />I’m a monster.</i><br /><br />Jack stepped off the transport ship and slowly walked down the docks of the spaceport. His hands shoved in his pocket, he didn’t smile when people smiled at him. He couldn’t struggle to do so. He’d been to many planets and many galaxies. Everywhere that he went, it wasn’t far enough. He lasted until there was a child, then he left again. Sometimes places popular, other places desolate and at the back end of the galaxy. He didn’t care, as long as he was as far away from Earth as he could be.<br /><br />He traveled a long way. He hadn’t run into the Doctor. He was rather thankful for that. The man would hate him. Though, there was no way the man could hate him more than he hated himself. He didn’t deserve to live. He wished he could just die and finally make it final.<br /><br />Pulling the small stopwatch out of his pocket, he stared at it, a single tear slipping down his cheek. “I’m so sorry I failed you,” he said softly. His voice was horse as he shoved it back in his pocket and kept walking. He didn’t know where he was going. A part of him didn’t care either. <br /><br /><br />***<br /><br /><i>Somewhere on Earth, Gwen phoned Martha. Her words were sad, full of tears and broken hearted. Somewhere on Earth, Martha phoned the Doctor, begging him to try to find the man who couldn’t die. A man who couldn’t die had nothing left to fear. And Martha feared, nothing left to live for, at least in his mind. It wasn’t true, he just needed someone to remind him of that.</i> urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:great_smile:25439 2008-09-01T06:51:28Z 2008-09-01T07:21:58Z <b><center>scene request drop-off.<br />AIM, Thread, Storybook friendly.</center></b>